I spent the last hour sitting in the Sierra Center food court observing people. Since my original observations filled two and a half pages on their own, I will present the more interesting of my objective observations. I will also be paying more attention to the couples or couple-like groups which I observed.
From my vantage point I saw a boy and girl in line for food. The guy paid for all the food. Two girls walked by my table linking elbows, laughing, and talking. A boy and girl walking down the staircase were talking – both of them had headphones in their ears – but they did not hold hands. They walked maybe about 6” apart. A boy and girl in the corner across from me were sitting very close so they could view the laptop screen in front of them. They appeared to be conversing about what was on the laptop screen as they kept pointing to the screen. The girl was tilting her head toward the guy, almost like she was about to rest her head on his shoulder, but she never did. Another guy (henceforth referred to as guy #1) and a girl were sitting with a laptop. The girl had one headphone earbud in her ear and was sitting directly in front of the laptop while the guy sat to her right at a right angle to the laptop. Guy #1 starts talking on his phone. Two guys joined their table (henceforth guys #2 and #3). They appeared to know each other and appear to know guy #1 better than the girl. The girl seemed to know who guys #2 and #3 were. Guy #1 talked to guys #2 and #3 more than the girl did. The girl then shifted her whole focus to her sandwich and her laptop. She leaned over to say something to guy #1, he nodded and continued talking with guys #2 and #3. The girl paid more attention to guy #1 than the two new arrivals but still focused on her laptop and her sandwich more than she focused on the conversation. 15 minutes later, guy #1 left and the girl entertained polite conversation with guys #2 and #3. Guy #2 left and then the girl focused more attention on guy #3, leaning forward, listening and conversing.
Yet another guy/girl/laptop setup was observed. The laptop was angled so both could see the screen even though they sit at right angles to each other. They lean close to each other to see the screen. They both scooted their chairs closer so they could share their lunch of teriyaki chicken and noodles. A guy and a girl walk in: the guy carries their food, their hands are loosely linked (2 or 3 fingers on each hand hooked to lightly grasp the fingers of the other person). They searched for a table, conversing, and the guy pointed out a table. 2 guys and 2 girls were looking for a table. The girls stuck close together. The group headed upstairs, the guys leading as a pair and the two other girls following directly behind them, also walking as a pair. The guys acted as the main “seekers” – they were doing the bulk of the looking, leading, etc., and the girls were following their directions. A guy and a girl entered with a foot or so distance between them. They split off in separate directions momentarily, until the guy realized and followed the girl. The girl picked up a sandwich, pointed at it, appearing to consult the guy’s opinion, and then a decision was made and the girl took the sandwich. A guy and a girl were playing cards for some time. There was very little conversation between them – their focus seemed to be the game not friendly conversation.
Of all the boy/girl pairs I observed, only one pair held hands as they walked, and then only a weak hold – two or three fingers hooked around each other. All other boy/girl pairs walked with varying amounts of distance between them – anywhere from 6” to 2 feet. There was also a pair of girls who walked by linking elbows (it is hard to speculate what their relationship definition was though as they were only in my sight range for a matter of seconds). The distance between people seemed to be closer if the people knew each other better or appeared to be “an item” (i.e., boyfriend/girlfriend).
While there were some girls that led the way and ultimately decided on where to sit, in most pairings, the men were the ones to point out a table, lead the way, pay for the food, or make a decision. This fits in well with the gender roles of our society where the man is seen as the hunter/provider figure.
I found it very hard to determine whether or not people were dating or boyfriend/girlfriend based solely on what I observed. There were only three couples I could definitely say appeared to be “an item” whereas the others either appeared to be hoping for something (in the case of the girl at the table with guys #1, #2, and #3), or “just friends” (in the case of the guy and girl playing cards). The only reason I knew who the couples were was because of their proximity to each other and the role that touch played. If they were casually touching each other (holding hands, sitting close enough that their shoulders touched, etc.), I generally inferred that they were a couple. This is because people who are “just friends” don’t generally allow themselves to penetrate another person’s bubble of personal space.
As far as radical romance is concerned, I didn’t notice any pairs that seemed to exhibit any radical signs of romance. All that I observed appeared to be quite typical and usual. However, I can say that of all the people I saw, they all seemed to be sticking closely to the standard gender stereotypes. For example, the men acted as the "hunters" when looking for tables (as mentioned before) while most of the women, if they were with these "hunters," followed along and let the men do the searching.
